


living in a world of fools

by moeyandchandon (lokalelyen)



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Aziraphale Runs His Mouth Once Or Twice, Canon - Book, Dialogue, Falling In Love, Friendship, Inspired by the BBC 4 Radio Play, It's Very Embarassing, M/M, POV Aziraphale (Good Omens), Pining, Pre-Arrangement (Good Omens), Sides in a Cosmic Chess Game
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-06
Updated: 2019-10-06
Packaged: 2020-11-26 00:23:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20921111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lokalelyen/pseuds/moeyandchandon
Summary: “I just think that it’s only fitting for us to be enemies, is all. I’m an angel, you’re a…”Crawly looked at him, the corners of his eyes crinkling ever-so-slightly.“Well, you know,” Aziraphale continued.An angel and a demon understand, right from the Beginning, that they have a lot more in common than Heaven and Hell would have them think.





	living in a world of fools

Although it had only been a couple of days since the Earth had been officially brought into existence, Aziraphale found that the latest of these admittedly short days, to put it rather simply, lasted longer than he felt was strictly necessary. The angel felt quite weary, from the tips of his wings right down to his celestial core, which was a first for him. He’d had many firsts down here on this strange new Earth - more than he would care to admit, if he were being completely honest. He found that he sometimes needed to get away from the majesty of God’s creations, even if for a little while, just to collect his thoughts.

As per his recent noontime habit, he glided over to the hill where his favorite fig tree stood. There were a great many others like it, but this one was special, in its own way; it sat on a large, grassy hill, a lone perch overlooking the vast scrubland below in a position he found rather conducive to quiet, solitary contemplation. As he flew closer, however, he found that his usually empty spot was very much occupied. He hadn’t recalled seeing this particular angel around before, but he was certain it _ was _an angel, judging from the way their golden wings glinted white in the sun’s rays.

He decided to make a show of fluttering his wings as he landed behind this stranger, who was seated at the base of his - well, God’s, to be technical - tree. “Er, hullo,” he chanced, suddenly aware that his voice was coming out shakier than he had intended.

The stranger turned around, and he could more clearly see that this was decidedly not an angel. Angels didn’t have horns, to start. They certainly weren’t covered in scales, either, and he had it on good authority that no self-respecting angel would manifest with such beastly eyes as that.

“Ah!” He had yet to see any angel smile as widely as the serpent from Eden just did, though. “It’s you! Aziraphale, right?”

“Right. And you must be, er, Crawly,” he stammered, barely recalling the demon’s name. He found himself swallowing a lump that had somehow found its way in his throat. “You’re, ah, in my spot...”

“There’s room for you, too,” said Crawly, who cocked his head to one side. “Just sit here right next to me, yeah?”

Aziraphale found that he didn’t need to be told twice. He carefully moved to sit next to the demon, folding his legs underneath him. Once he’d settled himself, the demon asked, “So, what brings you out here, then?”  
  
“Oh, you know, I just thought I…” He paused, and thought of how best to explain himself. “Actually, I’ve been coming here for a while, ever since I, er, transferred departments.”

“Transferred,” Crawly repeated. “Guard duty hasn’t been working out for you, eh? What’ve they transferred you to, exactly?”

“Well,” he bristled, “it’s a role of the utmost importance, if you must know, but I’ve no reason to divulge the specifics of such matters with the Enemy.” He paused, and gave Crawly what he hoped was a convincingly snide sidelong glance. “You understand, of course.”

Crawly hunched over himself, then, his brows twitching ever-so-slightly. “Oh, please don’t take offense, I didn’t mean anything by it… I was jussst curiousss, ‘sss’all.” He turns to meet Aziraphale’s gaze, amber eyes peering sheepishly up at him. “Er, for what it was worth, I thought you looked proper intimidating, at the gate. Definitely wouldn’t have fancied getting smote by you, if it were me, I’m certain.”

Despite himself, he couldn’t help but soften at the compliment, awkward though it was. “Why, thank you, Crawly. To be honest, though, it was rather dull work, standing around all day and looking out for trouble.” He returned his gaze, then said, “Though, I still look out for trouble, I suppose... They’ve got me guarding Adam and Eve, you see, while they’re out here on their own.”

“Guarding? As I seem to recall, you gave them that flaming sword - they should be able to guard themselves, now, shouldn’t they?”

“Well, from all manner of beasts and things, yes, we trust them to keep away from those.” He pursed his lips, trying to recall just how Gabriel had explained things, exactly. “It’s more of… guarding against further temptations, see.”

When Crawly just stared at him, slack-jawed, he hastily added, “No offence to you, of course.”

Here, the demon blinked for the first time since slithering onto God’s mostly blue Earth.

“Wait, wait,” he started, “you mean to tell me that He really went through all that trouble, kicking them out for messing with the fruit that gave them knowledge of Good and Evil…”

_ That you technically tempted them to do_, he wished to point out, though at this point Crawly had gotten up from the grass and was now pacing with his digitigrade legs, arms folded behind his back. And it was unbecoming of an angel to interrupt.

“And then, even though He literally cast them out for disobeying orders, He goes around and sends an angel to protect them from Evil anyway?”

Well, he had to hand it to him. The serpent made an excellent point, one he didn’t think he could dwell too long on.

“It does sound... contradictory, when you put it like that.” That seemed like a nice, safe answer to end on, but when Crawly continued to stare at him with those wide, searching eyes, Aziraphale felt something in him twinge rather uncomfortably. “Well, far be it from me to question the assignments they so graciously bequeath us,” he reasoned, sitting up straighter. “I was put here on this Earth to enact God’s Will, and God’s Will… will, er, be done.” He attempted to clear his throat, but the lump in it was firmly lodged. “I... have faith. That everything will turn out, ah, peachy-keen... eventually.”

“How, exactly?” Crawly had dropped down onto the grass, belly-first, and continued to peer up at Aziraphale with wide-eyed curiosity. “It hasn’t exactly been a barrel of laughs, here. Dreadful weather, so far. Nobody else for miles and miles off.” His lips pursed. “You don’t miss it, Up There?”

“Oh, no.” He said it before he even knew he had said it, which he hadn’t thought possible before, but Earth was constantly surprising him like that. “I quite like it here, actually, and I will happily continue to fulfill my duty here on this Earth for as long as I am required to do so.” And he wasn’t exactly keen on leaving it just yet, he thought, but he didn’t think the demon needed to hear that bit.

“That’s ineffability, for you.” There was something about the way Crawly said the word ‘ineffability’, like he had bit into the Forbidden Fruit and found a worm going about its business inside. “You do realize this means that we’re basically rivals, now? Like, I’ve got to be tempting the humans to do evil things, right, while you’re supposed to be guarding them against sin and steering them towards righteousness, that kind of thing.”

“Ah... Wait, what?”

“Yeah.” Crawly flopped down onto his back, though his gaze never faltered. “I’ve been specifically assigned to go out and tempt them, secure their souls for Down Below, whatever that means. I don’t think they were exactly sure how I’d go about it, either, but it’s something new, and I like a challenge, so.” He shrugged, though there was something about his face that didn’t add up with the nonchalance of the gesture.

“Really, now?” It was Aziraphale’s turn to blink. “I suppose that’s fine, then.”

“You seem to be taking it rather well.” Crawly’s tone was turning devilish, which signalled that he was _ scheming_, and he couldn’t very well have any of that, could he?

“Do not misunderstand me, you… hellspawn,” he said, the insult immediately leaving a less-than-ideal taste in his mouth. Blast it, what could he possibly say? “I just think that it’s only fitting for us to be enemies, is all. I’m an angel, you’re a…”

Crawly looked at him, the corners of his eyes crinkling ever-so-slightly.

“Well, you know,” Aziraphale continued.

“Fat lot of difference that makes,” said Crawly, who’d lifted himself up enough that he was now looking Aziraphale in the eye. “Look, we’re both just doing our jobs, you know that - I don’t actually think you’re half bad, for an angel, so I don’t see why you have to call me _ hellspawn _like you’re itching to smite me.”

“I’m not,” he admitted, “and it’s what you are, isn’t it?”

“From a technical standpoint, I didn’t _ spawn _ Down There, you know.” For a second, it seemed as though something changed, in the way Crawly looked at him. “But if we’re calling each other names, I might as well return the favor...”

He paused, giving his next word all the terrible weight he could possibly muster behind it.

“Angel.”

Aziraphale looked on, incredulous. “That’s the worst thing you can call me?”

“It’s what you are, isn’t it?” He flipped his long, dark hair over a scaly shoulder, looking entirely too self-satisfied.

“What I am,” Aziraphale huffed, “is a holy agent of Heaven, and that I am on the side of all that is righteous and just. I _ also _ happen to know that you are an infernal agent of Hell, that you are the _ Enemy_, and that you’re _ evil_.”

“...Yeah?” Serpentine nostrils flared open. “You don’t need a fancy sword to banish me to the netherworld, surely. I wouldn’t hold it against you, angel.”

Oh, he immediately wanted to somehow pull his words out from time itself, and make it so he hadn’t said anything at all! He felt strange things tugging at his core, almost like indigestion; though he had no way of knowing what that felt like at the time, having never truly digested anything at this point of his stay on this miserable, wonderful planet.

_ I’m sorry, I didn't know what I was thinking. _ “I don’t think I rather need to.” _ I didn’t mean it, you've been nothing but nice and courteous and sweet. _ “If I banished you now, well…” _ I rather like you, actually, and I'd be quite put out if I never got to see you again, after this. _ “...there wouldn’t be any evil around for me to thwart, would there?”

Crawly’s eyes lit up, then, and Aziraphale felt something impossible rise up in the core of his very being, and nestle itself in the shape of him. “Someone’s got to be here to muddy your perfect little world up, is that right?”

“You can very well try," he said, anxious to try out the new epithet, "serpent.”

He _ hmm_’s very thoughtfully, his mouth quirking up into a wide smile. “I suppose that’s fine, then.”

The only angel and demon on Earth for the entirety of its creation so far sat underneath that fig tree in comfortable silence, after that. They admired the new world without quite understanding it, much like how sea monkeys could not fully understand the shiny, new plastic tank; they saw and admired it, nonetheless, and they admired it together.

**Author's Note:**

> While this is grounded in book characterizations for the most part, it’s also heavily inspired by the BBC 4 radio play because I find the dynamic between Aziraphale and Crowley in it particularly endearing. Their initial banter at the Eastern Gate played out much more easily, I think, and there’s a certain level of comfortable familiarity and fondness in their interactions throughout the whole program that gets my fluffy little shipper heart all aflutter. So, that trust and comfort with each other was something I really wanted to explore and expand on, tying them in with the whole overarching themes of the book about being on opposing sides and what they actually mean in a more personal context.
> 
> Anyway, I'm on [tumblr](https://moeyandchandon.tumblr.com) if you wanna holler.


End file.
